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Many Parents know of and have heard those unexpected words from our children when they are upset hurt or angry.
And its not as though we haven’t heard them before or, even used some of them our self, but when we hear such words come rolling for the sweet lips of our toddler, it brings somewhat a new shock to us.
Our children pick them up in all sorts of places, from school, day care, television, over hearing conversations, in the family home and many other places.
We must do our best to shield our children from hearing this sort of talk in the family home, as we don’t have any control other places.
Sooner or later we are going to hear our children speak with a forked tongue.
When we hear these disrespectful words roll out of nowhere, making the atmosphere very uncomfortable, the best reaction is not to fly off the handle and make it worse.
Simply say nothing, and carry on the conversation as though it wasn’t heard by you.
Your child will either think he has got away with it or, he will realize he went to far this time, because your reaction wasn’t instant like other times.
An hour or two later, call your child aside and then have your bit to say, don’t threaten your child, but make it firmly understood quickly and leave the room before explanations begin.
The fact you said nothing to start with, will leave your child with time to think about what he said, and when called aside later he will know exactly why. Nor does it condone what he has said, regardless of the choice of words.
Children that swear in the company of their parents, normally get an on the spot reaction and this leaves the child with another way to gain attention if the others fail.
When our toddler swears its not considered as bad as our five or six year old, the younger child is merely copying from others and has no idea of the meaning.
Although your toddler is not aware he is swearing or saying anything bad, but he is aware of the attention he receives when using it.
Toddlers have a great sense of humor, mimicking us at our best and of course our worst, not that we are amused, when done at the wrong time can be a moment of complete embarrassment.
As for the older child it is serious and must not be allowed to continue, explain to your child there are other ways to let his feelings be known apart from swearing, with your support and understanding he will do a turn around.
If all else fails, Time Out may be your only break through with getting your child to understand the consequences of his unacceptable use of words.
Use the Time Out action consistently, sooner or later your child will find other ways to get your attention rather than swearing.
Article contributed by Theresea Hughes, creator of
DEFINITION OF SWEARING BY CHILDREN
WHY DO KIDS SWEAR? • Children sometimes use unacceptable language without knowing the meaning of the words. If they hear swearing from other children, adults, television, movies, music, or from parents, they are likely to repeat it. • Sometimes children use unacceptable words without knowing that they aren't supposed to. If it's acceptable for adults in the house to swear, children may assume that it is acceptable for them, too. • Children under five often swear to get a reaction. Although they may not know what the words mean, they do have an understanding that certain off-limit words are used with more strength and feeling, and carry a power that most other words don't have. If a word gets a strong reaction, they will be likely to use it again. • Typically, children will experiment with swearing and testing the language limits at ages four and five. • Children need help learning appropriate words and actions to use when they are angry or frustrated. Some Suggested Approaches to dealing with child Swearing problems: DON’T DO THIS: Don't give your child attention for swearing
Children typically grow and learn new skills in their own time and at their own pace within the wide range of what is normal.
Sometimes, children need a bit of extra help to keep their development on track, or to stay healthy and happy.
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Tips for Stopping Your Toddler Swearing
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